My Photographs in the paper!

My photography in the newspaper

I captured the pictures of the newspapers with my I-phone camera, not always the best camera sorry!

This was the original that I submitted

So I went out on a whim and submitted my photography pictures to the newspaper. I didn’t think they would get published since I am not a very good photographer and really only do it because I love taking pictures! So, needless to say I was very surprised when my friend Carol mentioned on my Facebook wall that she saw my picture in the paper!

Just goes to show, life is full of beautiful surprises!

My next mission is to do a year in photos, taking a picture a day. (Although, I am pretty sure I do this already! haha!)

As always thanks for reading. <3

-Johanna Dunn-

Negative People

Unhappy people are funny, in a somewhat non-comical way. They hate their own loneliness so much that they are desperate, relentless in their attempts to destroy the mere sight of someone else’s happiness .

Envious beings living amongst others often long-awaited jubilation.

For I am not speaking of negative moods, the ones that shift with time like that of seasons. No, the negativity I speak of is those that take the form of people. The people who spend there lives in desperate attempts at functioning yet remaining in a state of constant disarray. There pessimistic attitude’s prove detrimental to their lives as time and time again they interrupt even the mere chance of  joyous moments. With their constant state of gloom has an unimaginable way of asphyxiating the moods of even the innocent people around them, until they too are left paralyzed, dejected, and depressed. Their constant use of complaints seek to make even the most sympathetic bystanders simply apathetic. Indifferent to your needs as they can only focus on their own present moment, their own complaints, their own disharmony. It is as though their words suddenly have the power of becoming poisonous arrows that have the great capability of puncturing you all at once. It is ultimately the recognition of this damaging pattern of negativity that is essential.

Today faced with these very issues I  have come to the conclusion that I refuse to be suffocated by other people’s negativity.As the saying goes, I refuse to let them “rent space in my head.” I simply cannot thrive while being smothered, forced to live amongst their personal chaos.

I do not wish to waste my energy taking part in the usual bantering that goes along with ridding myself of these people, the side talk, the bad mouthing..etc. Instead, I choose to focus on my own presence, my own happiness, my own mind state, before I choose to judge or participate in others. I think perhaps Trent said it best in his blog “The Cost of Negativity” when he stated: “The best use for negative feelings is to burn them as the fuel for something positive without dumping that negativity out onto others.” http://www.thesimpledollar.com/2010/05/24/the-cost-of-negativity/

today, I must choose to fill my own life with the people who share the common goal of positiveness.

The people that know that true happiness lies in inspiration, creativity, authenticity, humor, grace, wisdom, and love.The people who understand that with clarity comes a state of peacefulness, and serenity.

Although, these people may be hard to find I would rather spend the entirety of my life searching for them, then be weighed down with others negativity. When it comes down to it, even if I can’t find anyone else that share these same goals, today, I am content with  my own company. Today, I realize what an old friend used to tell me, that I am perfect and whole just the way I am and that there is true peace in the undisturbed flow of positivity. Perhaps, it is true when they say positive things happen to positive people, but don’t take my word for it, get out there and

try it yourself!!!

One more thought:

The dictionary defines negativity as follows:

1. Lacking positive or constructive features, especially:

a. Unpleasant; disagreeable: had a negative experience on his first job.

b. Gloomy; pessimistic: a negative outlook.

c. Unfavorable or detrimental: a negative review; a negative effect on the child’s development.

d. Hostile or disparaging; malicious: ran a negative campaign against her opponent.

The dictionary defines positive as follows:

1. characterized by or expressing certainty or affirmation a positive answer

2. composed of or possessing actual or specific qualities; real a positive benefit

3. tending to emphasize what is good or laudable; constructive he takes a very positive attitude when correcting pupils’ mistakes

4. tending towards progress or improvement; moving in a beneficial direction

5. (Philosophy) Philosophy

a. constructive rather than skeptical

b. (of a concept) denoting the presence rather than the absence of some property

6. independent of circumstances; absolute or unqualified

7. (prenominal) Informal (intensifier) a positive delight

In the definitions of positivity and negativity, how do you choose to be defined?

Help a Stranger.

A beach project inspired out of boredom…I decided it might be a fun idea to write positive messages on rocks at the rock beach and then put them in random places for strangers to find, in hopes that somewhere, someone would stumble upon them and it would put a smile on there face. Continuing the belief that a stranger is just a friend we have yet to meet….. These are just some of the ones I did. These particular ones read….

Take a chance, it just might change your life…

Smile… &

You are perfect just the way you are.

Her

HER

I strive to sustain anything but clinging
But there’s no denying that I gravitate toward truth
And recognize what is valuable.
See- some people have energy comparable to oxygen
Let this serve as a warning:
There is a force so incredible
That there are no means of containing it.
As elusive as memories on Sunday mornings,
She could have you exhaling fear and breathing in comfort,
Catching amber gazes with ocean blue eye traps,
Creating serendipitous surrenders of consequence for choices.
Bringing to life aspirations in the form of being
And dreaming in the moments caused by blinking.

I’m living life on a tangent,
Sleeping my nights on a lullaby
That isn’t meant for the daylight.
I sing your story in corners of chaos
And drop lines of sincerity
To my memories of you raising me,
Skipping stones on the river
Of prosperity that flows away from here.
As the rocks sink from the surface quickly
I am imagining that some find themselves
Light enough to be caught within the current
Drifting miles away
Dancing in deflected sunlight and icy waters
Then reaching the bottom and settling.
I’m not sure if what is happening
is reality or dreaming
the truth or just seeming.
Because at the end of the day what I’d like for it to be
Is irrelevant
Compared to what it is.
As Inevitably:
Stones sink,
Rivers bend,
And daylight breaks.
But let this serve as a warning:
There is a force so unwilling to compromise
The truth for acting
That you could bury her knee high in solid dirt
And she would breathe herself to the surface,
consume you at your roots, and nourish her being in the process.
Drop her in the middle of the river and she will skip that surface four times solid before swimming to shallow waters to feel the sunlight.
Bury your face in shame from lowered expectations and your gaze will never be returned to you by those ocean traps.
While you confuse chaos for your sanity,
She’s still steady breathing.
waiting for your responsorial song.

Things I Didn’t Need Poem (Unfinished)

This poem is unfinished. Bear with it xoxo

Things I Didn’t Need

I didn’t need your lies to survive, yet you provided them regardless.

I didn’t need your fake promises of change to keep me going, I assure you I would have survived in spite of them.

I didn’t need you to wound me to know I am capable of bleeding, I’ve known it all along.

I didn’t need your disapproval to know opposition exists.

I didn’t need you to pretend just to keep me holding on, I guarantee you I’ve never been good at letting go in the first place.

I didn’t need your random displays of attention to verify the reality of my meager existence.

I didn’t need your constant threats of rejection in order to feel excluded from life.

I didn’t need your cruel words to grasp my faults I guarantee you I understand them all too well.

I didn’t need your continuous belittling; I assure you I’ve always been my own worst enemy.

I didn’t need you to disregard me in order to feel your constant disdain towards me.

and

I didn’t need your habitual neglect to know how very cold this world can be.

-Johanna M. Dunn-

Judgement Day

Note before reading: I wrote this poem a long time ago when as you can tell from reading it, I was not in a very peaceful place. I am posting it here because it has always been a gentle reminder as to how your mind can work when you are not centered. Although, re-reading this poem I realize it is not that good but oh well!!! I hope you enjoy!

Judgement Day

The judgers get judged in the end…

without a helping hand to lend.

They smile at you with there big fake eyes,

but its up to you to realize.

They’ll judge you if you let them,

there always looking for the next to condemn.

They’ll smile in your face and laugh behind your back.

just waiting to make there next attack.

Having no choice you’ll rise above it,

Your wrongs you’ll readily admit.

You’ll stand up and fight on your own,

cause baby there cover just got blown.

It’s to late now, they’ve pushed you to hard.

But girl don’t let them leave you scarred.

You’ve learned your lesson now,

and your going to get through this… somehow.

JMD

Go, Pursue, Discover, Learn, Share.

I was born to the name Johanna, middle name Maze. I have always gone by Hanna. I think perhaps it suits me better. However, the verdict is still out. I grew up in little old Rhode Island. I have always found Rhode Island a great fit and never felt the sudden urge to leave. So it is here, in this little ocean state that I have called home for the last twenty five years. Although, after giving this statement a second more of consideration, I wonder if it wasn’t that I never felt the urge to leave but rather was more of the fact that change has always been a scary thought for me. I have always been really, really good at staying in things that are comfortable even if they are no longer working. At any rate, at this point in my journey this is where I stand.

I wake everyday with an overwhelming need for something more. Now this is not to say that I am not happy it’s rather more of a feeling that is waiting patiently somewhere in the background.

I should have started by explaining that I’ve always been a complex human being, perhaps, even difficult. I have often found in my life that when most people get this feeling they attempt to use some temporary distraction to try to fill this void, but nothing materialistic is going to fill this. If it had hell it would have been filled a long time ago. In saying this I mean that I’ve gone down that road before and it still leaves this overwhelming longing for something more. (I promise the message I am trying to get across is a positive one but I can’t do so without adding the next few sentences, bear with me through the negativity.)

What it ultimately comes down to is that I am sick of routines, of doing the same thing day in and day out. I am sick of working hard with little to no reward. I am sick of the pattern of feelings that are forever constantly circling around in my head. I am sick of the same scenery; the same negative people that crowd the streets of this town. It feels as though every time I try to walk away from them I find myself surrounded by three more. Granted, I am fully capable of understanding that I am solely responsible for the people I have chosen to surround myself with. There are many things in this place, in this state, in this town, on this street, that I am completely head over heels in love with, but I must rely on faith that they will be there when this need is filled, when this journey is over.

With that being said, the need I feel is to get out, to spread my wings, to venture to new heights, to stumble upon new experiences, to discover new places, new cultures, and a new meaning to life. I think about all the life out there that I am so ignorant too. What it ultimately comes down to is that,

I wish to travel. I wish to explore. I wish to learn.

I long for culture, for education, for experience but most of all, I wish to restore my faith in humanity. My faith in myself. I long for life and all the wonder and beauty it holds.

With this being said, I have decided to quote Nike on this one and “just do it.” I will pack my bags in August and set out on a journey through Tibet & India and wherever else my journey leads me to. I wake now and just thinking about it, brings a new, restored passion to my soul. I will document every step of my journey through my photography, art and writing. I have no set plans, no set destinations, just a backpack, myself, a glass half empty and whole lot of hope.

I am going to spend the next few months leading up to my trip making a list of things I hope to do. The first item on the list is to spend a week or two among Buddhist monks, I have always such a passion when it comes to Buddhism and all its beautiful teachings and have been a student for five years now. But I suppose that is a topic for another post, on another day.

I wrote the following quote a long time ago and now it’s time to follow it.

“You must always purse your passion wherever it happens to take you. You must always follow it with a peaceful mind, an open heart, and a whole lot of faith. When you do you’ll find yourself suddenly aligned with the universe, it is in this space that people are capable of the most beautiful miracles. So ask yourself this, what is stopping you from following your passion? What is stopping you from creating your very own miracle?”

I also should mention here that I wouldn’t have the freedom to do any of this without some of the best people in the world. I owe this whole idea to my loving father and mother, for they are the ones who planted this idea as a seed in my head and also to Kayla & Jon for always being there to support me in all the loving ways that they do. If anyone has any travel tips be sure to let me know! As always, thanks for reading!

-Johanna M. Dunn

Fearlessness

“Fearlessness takes a hold of me as I climb onto your back. For I know you will take care of me as I have always promised to take care of you. Together were unstoppable, invincible even. You carry me effortlessly, I love that about you. For no place feels more at home then on top of you back. For that is when I realize I am no longer on top of your back but rather on top of the world. The excitement you bring me makes me feel as though I am a little kid again. For with every step, you magically put my mind at ease. You are so gentle and yet so incredibly strong. You communicate through your ears, yet it is your eyes that truly speak to me. For that ride however long it may be, nothing in the whole world could go wrong. For it is only then I realize you don’t belong to me;
For, I have always belonged to you”

-Johanna M. Dunn

A Night’s Dream

“A Night’s Dream”

There are times much like tonight that the quietness of the night invites me into its deep undisturbed serenity.  It evokes in me a certain degree of peacefulness that can only be felt at times when the whole world is sleeping calmly, undisturbed. (Although I know this is not true I like to imagine it being so.) It feels as though the only three things awake in the whole universe are myself, the moon and the stars.

I close my eyes and take a deep, long breath; and in the process of doing so I realize I can hear the boats down by the sea, swaying softly on their salty, uncharted waters. It fascinates me that I didn’t hear them at first.  That is when I come to the realization that perhaps it is not just myself, the moon and the stars after all, that I didn’t consider the millions of fish very much awake and swimming in their nights deep-sea.  I giggle to myself as I visualize their hidden, secret world and giggle further still when I find myself wishing to be able to watch the very spectacle of it all.

I imagine myself perched on a swaying boat, moving freely side to side with the ever-changing oceans tides.  I picture it rocking me slowly to sleep, with the stars twinkling high above my head and the moon, as it always has, lighting my way. I give into temptation and drift softly, sweetly and silently into the nights embrace and quickly yet quietly drift into the most wonderful night’s sleep, full of beautiful dreams of the most stunning, exotic fishing swimming all around me, delicately blanketing me as they allow me to explore every aspect of their world. They allow me to swim side by side with them as if I am a part of their pack.

I graciously smile at them as I find my heart suddenly over filled with joy. Yet, realizing they do not understand this gesture, I find myself giggling once again. I see everything there is to see in this underwater world, in MY underwater world, from minnows to dolphins, from starfish to sea horses… the beauty of the sea surrounds my every move and I feel light, elated, at peace. I am not scared when I see the larger portions their world has to offer because so far this underwater world has been nothing but gentle to me.

They move with such freedom, such dignity and determination.  I am so consumed with every aspect of their world that I find myself moving with this same freedom. It is right when I find myself wishing to be a part of this world, I realize it is time to say goodbye.  It is also right then that I hear a voice; I recognize this voice, for I have heard it many times before, on many different occasions. It is my conscience speaking to me; it is telling me that I can and should take this lesson home with me that I too can make this peace an essential quality in my own life, that it is not too late to move with this same freedom, dignity and determination that was displayed before me tonight.

I nod my head in understanding and slip slowly back into reality. When I wake I find myself smiling. I find a renewed sense of peace all around me. I vow to take these lessons with me wherever I journey and promise to remember when feeling lost to always remember the very lessons I learned that very night the whole world was lost in their peaceful sleep.

That very night my three friends the moon, the stars and sea in fact became a part of me.

-Johanna M. Dunn

5/5/2010

“Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.”

It is so easy in our society to get caught up in all the things that are going wrong in one’s life. The feelings of inadequacy, guilt, the overwhelming feeling of never being able to do enough, to always wanting to give more. They say every coin has two sides and when you flip the coin you begin to realize, it is just as easy to be grateful for every single blessing this life has given us.

The problem is we often don’t open our eyes long enough to see things for truly what they are, beautiful, yes just the way they are. Every moment, every minute, every second we are on this earth we are blessed to be able to take another step, a step in the right direction. There will always be negativity, there will always be drama and chaos but when you stop looking at it, looking for it, it fades into the background until it suddenly fades away. If you do not invite darkness into your path you will always walk in the light. If you surround yourself with good with positive people and positive energy,  the bad will quickly not have a place to rest and will slowly dissipate. A process no doubt, but one truly worth the effort.

If you could choose happiness, if you could chose hope, if you could choose faith, if you could choose love,  the question is would you? How much would you sacrifice in order to live this way. Would you choose giving up on all those negative people who burden you with their negative energy’s, with their idle gossip,  with their pessimistic attitudes?  Ask yourself what are they bringing into your life? What and who am I choosing to surround myself with? The energy you are left with when you are done interacting with those certain people…does it refresh you or drain you? Make you happy or feel depressed?  Then ask yourself the tougher question, why am I bringing this negative energy into my life?

What is stopping me from living the life I have always imagined?

Nine out of ten times it is fear. Fear of the unknown, fear of truly seeing yourself for what you truly are, fear of the unspoken word, fear of others opinions, the fear of being disappointed & hurt.

Lets for once stop and look fear straight in the face. The Budhist’s preach that the more you walk into the fear the quicker it will dissipate.  For fear only comes from uncertainties. Yet, we must travel in the direction of our fear. Take time to sit with the feeling. Take a moment to get to know yourself. I promise the uknown is not that scary.  Let it bring feelings of exhilaration, let it stimulate your curiosity, leave you feeling refreshed and hopeful, stop being such a cynic!!!

The fear of seeing yourself as you truly are should excite you!  You had your best friend with you this whole time and you didn’t even know it!

Fear of the unspoken word and of others opinions somewhat go hand in hand. Why fear what people say, for it is only their opinion and if you have already done the previous step and now truly see yourself for the beautiful, newly inspired person you are; who cares what they think or say! True friends already know how incredible you are in the first place and the believer of their stories (and they are just that tales spun out of fiction a good 99% of the time) the believer of their stories is just someone intrigued by the drama of their tale. Either way it is nothing that should concern you or even slightly bother you! Let them have their strong opinions,  the only one they are weighing down is themselves! Keep giving everyone the benefit of the doubt. The next time when someone is spinning a pretty tale let them know that you are not interested in idle gossip or the dramatic tale they have spun. Most of the time, it is to make themselves feel better or they are simply  bored. Either way it is the inner workings of their small, sick mind, feel compassion for them & love them regardless.

For we should have the strongest compassion for those people we deem as our enemies. For that is the only way to cease hatred, to stand on a common ground, to truly know love.

As far as the fear of being dissapointed and hurt, we don’t live in a fairy tale world, there will always be some disappointment and hurt.  Yet, it is what you do with it that is significant! If the pain you are experiencing is coming from another human being, do you learn from it and vow to never bring such pain on another? Do you allow it to make you stronger and therefor a better person? Or do you seek revenge and the need to hurt another?

If you have sat long enough with yourself to get to know yourself truly,  you will understand that most of the time we bring the hurt upon ourselves. What you ask? Completely untrue and unfounded. She or he did this to me! No, you chose to let there words affect you in the manner that it did, therefor bringing on hurt and suffering to yourself.  Wether it be a conscience decision or not, the point is most of the time we allow ourselves to fall into this very sticky trap. It therefor becomes our job to be careful as to how we let others words & actions affect us, and in return to be equally as careful with our own words & actions as to not hurt another.

In a world were our human make up, our human genes from one person to the next are 99.9% the same, why can’t we realize that our similarities far outweigh our differences?

Perhaps, we will someday until then treat everyone with compassion & respect, choose love not hatred,  rise above fear,  pursue happiness,  your dreams, and have faith that the rest will soon follow. Remember it’s a process not a quick destination, be patient.

-Hanna  Dunn 03/08/2010